How to Deal with Haters

This is an attempt on our part to create an OVERVIEW of how to deal with haters, especially online. The concept came about through a discussion we had with the creators of NYC Create.

If you are a creative person or an artisticpreneur, this can often mean you are someone who puts yourself “out there.” Often, if you are creative, you will have the desire to share what you are doing creatively. Unfortunately, once you introduce your creation to the public, especially if it is online, you will face the wrath of haters.

The key way of dealing with haters we believe is through having compassion for them. Those who create usually don’t have the inclination to attack someone and often want to help people. So it is hard sometimes for a creative to face her or his haters. Who are these haters? Why are they attacking you?

Frequently that hating – although directed at you – does not have to do with you but rather with the hater’s state of mind. So when you come across someone who is a hater, don’t look at them with animosity. A hater, especially one who remains anonymous, is a trouble person and deserves your empathy. Honestly feel sorry for them. It doesn’t mean you are taking a position of being better than the hater and taking a position of looking down at her or him. Coming from a place of empathy means recognizing that the hater is lashing out due to pain that she or he has inside.

For example, if you have someone who is hating you in the comments section of your blog or video, you can respond by asking them where they are coming from? Just imagine how much rage they must have bottled up inside of them that leads to them hating. In short if you are a hater, you are not coming from a good point of view.

You might start by asking:

“Hey, what’s wrong? How can I help you? What’s the real problem?”

Clearly this doesn’t always work and sometimes it’s better to just ignore the hate. But remember, haters are broken people who use hate as an ineffective way to deal with their internal problems.

When you first have a hater hating you might initially be offended,  hurt or angry but remember that this person is crying out for help like a baby that is acting out. Ask yourself if you can go to them with some compassion.

Typically haters are misunderstood people. If you use compassion there is the possibility of turning this rage-aholic into a loyal follower. But again, sometimes it’s best to ignore. You really have to use your intuition as to what is the best path for you to take.